Relay Race

My children and I
With these smiles juxtaposed with
Holes of loss and longing
We hold on tight
Create space to be
Be-ing is necessity in this
Wilderness
I lead with scattered thoughts of
How and which and even then
When my daughter sings and my son laughs
I am taken aback
Illusionary strength to them
Weakness in thought to me
Endless action
Days without touch
An ear/ true grounding
Yet I still get up
I push thru
I seek solace in
Kindred mamas who search for breath
In the smallest of ways
Resuscitation a relay race
This sport between mamas who have
No choice/ no real voice
So
I push to make, to create, to conjure
Big life in baby steps
I know this path
This magic is what I get
Reminding myself each minute
It's not JUST ME
So
I work and work and work
To be free